Modesty!

Can the way you dress temp a man to lust?

I was in a bible study a few years ago and

 one wife was talking about something her husband told her. 

Her husband was a Deacon in the church 

and it made it difficult when women wore low cut shirts when he was ushering.

I took that story to heart and I felt so bad for this man.

A man that was a God fearing man

and was trying to guard his heart and eyes.

But, there we are as women making things more difficult for him.

Even in church.

The definition of Modesty is:

behavior, manner, or appearance intended to avoid impropriety or indecency.

Indecency......

That's hardly even in our vocabulary anymore.

We live in a world that doesn't care about modesty.

It's all about how much attention a woman can get

and how much skin she can show. 

Everything is about looks.

Everything is about Pride.

Me, Me, Me....

Now, I know that not everyone is going to agree with me.

Women are not to blame for men's lustful thoughts.

But, couldn't we help them out a bit.

Maybe, we could NOT make it harder?

A heart for Modesty is motivated

by a love for one's fellow man.

I love the men around me.

I don't want to help them fall.

I want to help them learn to protect their eyes.

It's already a hard world for them to be in,

we shouldn't be making it harder.

Modest dress is also about discernment,

having an awareness of others and our environment.

We can dress modest and still be fashionable.

We don't have to show skin to be in style.

We should be caring about keeping our bodies private.

Our bodies are for our husbands or future husbands.

Not to share with the world.

Also.....

What does this show our daughters?

The world is already so difficult,

without us letting our 12 year old daughters

 dress like most adults shouldn't.

Where does dressing like this lead our daughters?

What does this tell them what we think about them?

What are they telling the boys and men around them?

What kind of attention are they looking for?

I'm lucky (for now), my 13 year old daughter is very modest.
More modest then I was at her age.
She won't let her bra straps show, 
She always wears shorts or leggings under her dresses, 
and most of the time 
wears a tank top over her tank top bathing suit.
I sure hope she stays this way and protects her body
but one day I might have to fight her on this.
And.... fight I will. 
Protecting her is my job. 
Even if she doesn't agree with me or understand.

As women, we are called to show modesty to the young girls around us.

We all have someone looking up to us.

It's time to start showing them how to love themselves

without the need to show their bodies.

Be the example!

I'm not saying that I'm perfect in this.

I'm not.

It's a hard thing to buy clothes that are modest.

You really have to shop around to find tank tops that aren't low cut.

Or shorts that your cheeks aren't hanging out of. 

But, as we go shopping next, 

or pick something to wear out of our closet. 

Maybe we can remember to buy something

or pick something that is a little more modest.

Maybe...... we can remember that what we wear represents 

how we represent God.

How would he want you to represent him?

What would he say about what you choose to wear?

1 Timothy 1:9-10

Likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, 

with modesty and self-control,

 not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire,

but with what is proper for women who profess godliness with good works.

What is Beautiful?

What is Beautiful?

Where do we look to find beauty?

Magazines? Movies? Friends? God?

What defines your beauty?

Feeling beautiful is such a hard subject for me. 

I have never felt beautiful.

Since I was a kid I was made fun of by multiple classmates. I started wearing make up and really caring about my looks when I hit 7th grade. I got tired of people making fun of me and I wanted to be someone different than who I had been. For me the people around me defined my beauty and still does. I still measure myself against everyone I meet, even women I just pass by in the grocery store. I have been overweight for most of my life, except a few short times. My weight has fluctuated over the years so that has added a lot to how I feel. I always hated my freckles and use make up to cover them as much as possible. I still won't even go out of my house without make up on and I put it on right after I get out of the shower, I workout in make up, I do yard work in make up, most of the time I go to bed with make up because I don't want to look bad, I always have make up on. I don't really like looking in mirrors or taking pictures. I'm constantly self conscious of what others think of me. When I'm out I think people are looking at me and judging me. I don't really like to eat in public because I feel like people will judge me because I am too fat to be eating. Even when people have said I am beautiful I use the excuse that they didn't really mean it. I mean, how bad is that, that I can't even believe other people when they say something nice. 

I can be in a room with other women and I will get so down on myself. I will feel worse and worse the longer I'm there. I compare everything about myself to those around me. I think things like; everyone else is prettier than me, I'm so fat that I shouldn't even be in public, why would anyone even want to look at me, I wish I could lose weight so I can look like them, I wish I had nice legs, I wish I could wear nice clothes and have them look good on me, I just want to be skinny and pretty. 

I'm my own worst critic!

Why do I let the world tell me how I should look?

Why do I feel like I need to look like everyone else to be beautiful?

We live in a society that puts a high degree of importance on physical appearance. It demands us to glamorize ourselves before we are deemed attractive. Our society neglects the other aspects of beauty besides the physical nature of a woman. If you don't look like a model then you are unattractive. We spend so much money on beauty products and surgeries every year and we are still not satisfied with how we look. Young women in their twenties are having surgeries and Botox and just continue to change their looks every chance they get.

What truly makes a woman beautiful?

True beauty comes from within. 
We have all heard this and know it but do we really believe it?

“Beauty is not in the face; beauty is a light in the heart.” 
― Kahlil Gibran

 I found a list of what men think are qualities of a beautiful woman; passion, compassion, confidence, takes care of herself, accepting of her body, her smile, intelligence, optimism, what makes her unique and many more. 
This is a list from men? 
How cool is that? They really think beauty is being secure in ourselves and be whatever it is that makes us, us. So it's true that beauty comes from within. It's what makes you, you  that makes you beautiful.  

What do we look like through God's eyes? 

When God looks at us he sees someone so very beautiful. We are his daughters and he created us to all be beautifully different. He sees each of us as flawless, beauty radiating creatures. He doesn't want us to change anything about ourselves. He created you to be unique and he loves every part of you. If we were all the same we would be quite boring. 

We've all been there at least at one point in our lives and for some of us it's an everyday battle. We don't ever feel like we are good enough, like we will never measure up. We place unrealistic expectations on ourselves and we are pressing thoughts of discouragement even further into our hearts. Why do we feel unwanted, undesirable, and unaccepted?

We should try to see ourselves the way God sees us. We need to stop thinking about everyone else and start being ourselves. Find what you like, what your passionate about, what your good at and excel at these things. Be kind and loving. Find the quirks that make you special and enjoy those things. Enjoy your freckles, your crooked nose, your curly hair. Just be you and emit the best you. Be the woman that God made you to be and there you will find the beauty inside which will radiate out of you.

1 Peter 3:3-4   Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight.