Top 15 Places I Would Love to Visit

To travel, to see the world! 

To look upon the colors of the world.

To see how other people live, the animals and to see other lands.

This would make me so happy.

Everyone says to travel when you are young and now I know why. Once you get settled into a job and have kids you just can't do it. You don't have the time or the money to travel. I wish I would've known back when I was younger. 

My husband and I would love to travel but like I said it would take a lot to do that. We really don't have the money or the time. We were talking this last week about traveling and decided that we have an old alhambra (water jar if anyone remembers those) jar and we keep our change in it. Most of the time we just take the money ever so often and roll it to deposit into the bank. We decided to let it fill up and have it for one destination at a time. This way we will be able to save up the money and we just have to figure out the time. It could take forever to save up but it will be worth it.

So here is my top 15 places that I would like to visit:

1. Ireland

Just looking at this picture and all the others you can find online just makes you want to go. It's absolutely beautiful. Plus, I'm mainly Irish with a few other things. My husband has a bit of Irish as well so that work for both of us.

The castles, the rolling green hills and of course the beer. Those are just a few reasons why. I have just always had a desire since I was a child to visit here.

2. Scotland

I have a bit of Scottish in me as well so that 's my first desire but also it's stunningly beautiful as well. 

3. Alaska (this is in my country but I still want to visit so I added it)

I have wanted to go to Alaska for a long time. It's so beautiful and there are things you will never see anywhere else. 

These top three places my husband and I have both had as our top places to visit. 

4. Portugal

This one is for my husband. He wants to go to The Azores. This is his heritage and he would like to visit. Oh darn I have to enjoy this extremely beautiful place. I would love to visit it as well. When you look up the pictures of this place it's absolutely gorgeous. 

5. Israel

First and foremost this would be amazing to walk where Jesus walked. To go to the Holy Land.

The Garden Tomb, The Mount of Olives, Mount Zion and Bethlehem. Seriously this would just be such an amazing trip to take.

6. New Zealand

A beautiful Island!

Well, not just one island.

There area amazing animals and beautiful waters to be seen here.

7. Italy

I think of Italy as most people think of it a country of romance.

This picture right here is one for sure to go see.

I want to taste all their delicious food and seem their amazing buildings.

8. Greece

Ancient Greece!

Plus beautiful waters and cities.

9. Japan

My husband I'm sure wouldn't like the busy city. I had an exchange student from Japan when I was in high school and ever since then I have wanted to go. The bamboo grove would be great to see and to have Sushi all the time...... Sounds good to me :)

10.Austrailia

Australia has so many things to do. From the Sydney Opera House to the Great Barrier Reef. The waterfalls are supposed to be spectacular and the animals, I would love to see the animals.

11. France

France, another romantic country. The Eiffel Tower, Paris, the Notre Dame Cathedral. So many things to do in France. The food must be phenomenal.

12. Germany

My mom lived in Germany for a while when my dad was in the army. She would tell me things about their roads, the beer and how they use all white Christmas lights. I love all white Christmas lights. I think I would love to go for Oktoberfest of course. I would like to see the Berlin wall and the beautiful castles.

13. Sri Lanka

I heard the snakes are terrible (which almost makes me change my mind). I really just found out about this place but I would love to visit. They have beautiful beaches and mountains. Ancient buildings and Elephants :)

14.Spain

So many Cathedrals in Spain to see. Going to Madrid and Barcelona, the bull fights and the food.

15. Mexico

I know this should be an easy one because I live in California. I have never been to Mexico. My husband has been. He used to go fishing with his Dad there. I will take a small place like this and stay on the beach.

So these are the places that I would love to travel to. I hope we can start soon but with financial difficulties it will probably not start until our kids are grown. It's just a goal for the future. Something to look forward to. We should all have goals that we strive for in the future. :) Comment on the country you would like to visit the most.

Proverbs 16:9 The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps.

When God Doesn't Make Sense....

Tragedy.....

The one thing that almost always makes us question God.

Where are you God?

Why did you let this happen?

I was praying and you didn't come through.

Where are you??

I have seen some amazing things this last week in our small town. An astonishing girl of 16 was in a car accident with her older sister. Her sister came out of it with minor injuries but the 16 year old was in serious condition in a coma. She had major swelling on her brain. 

I had the honor of being this young lady's Awana leader for her 5th and 6th grade year. I also helped with our youth group and got to spend some time with her there as well. This was an exceptional girl and she just became more amazing as she got older. She loved God and wasn't afraid to show it. She was always helping people and she had the most beautiful smile. I always hoped to raise daughters like her. When I met her I just knew she was special and I hoped one day my daughters would be just as sweet, loving, God fearing and helpful as this girl. Not all girls are this way. We live in a hard world and we need more girls like her to change the world and make it a better place.

Right after the accident there was a gofundme account, a Facebook page set up and a fund raiser dinner planned by family friends. Our small community posted all day on the Facebook page and as of right now they have raised $28,000 on the go fund me account. This last weekend the town flooded the hospital both days and met at the high school and prayed and prayed. 

The whole town rallied around this family and then outreached to other communities and pretty soon across the world. Everyone was praying for this wonderful young lady to be healed. On the Facebook page they set up a time of 12:15pm for everyone to come together at the same time everyday and pray for her. It was such a wonderful feeling of so many praying at the same time. The Facebook page was filled with prayers and encouragement for her and her family. Last night we went to the fund raiser dinner and there were so many people there that we waited in line for 3 hours to get our food. The line was all the way down Main Street. It was quite amazing to see how such a small community can come together.

This amazing young lady went to be with the Lord and I am so heart broken. I really believed that God was going to heal her. I didn't think that God would take this wonderful girl from this world. She would make such a difference. I thought this would be such an amazing miracle for God to show his healing grace. There were people praying that don't normally pray. There were people praising God through worship songs that you wouldn't normally see in church. I thought "this is it God," your going to show your miracles to all these people and you are going to use this wonderful girl to bring so many people to you. Then the post came of her passing....

It just crushed me. I can't believe the pain that her family must be going through. Her friends, her cheer team. The loss of  a daughter, sister, grand daughter, niece, cousin and friend. I wondered why she couldn't have spent her life living a loving testament for God and sharing her life with others. Sometimes someone is taken too early and this fits her for sure. She was loved by all and will be missed in this small town dearly. 

So where is God?

Why didn't he answer our prayers?

He is loving her right now, holding her in his arms. He had a different purpose for her life here on this earth then the one we all thought. She has received her healing but it just wasn't here on earth it was up in Heaven with her Heavenly father. I just think about the joy she must be having right now. No more pain or sorrow. Only pure unfathomable heavenly joy. 

If God loves us why would he let tragedy happen to us? 

While God encourages us to pray for a miracle, he doesn't always intervene. We don't really know his reason for taking her at such a young age but these are just things we won't understand this side of Heaven. God doesn't make every thing happen. Sometimes, things just happen. 

God will convert the suffering and use it for our good!

Even in her tragedy and her passing God is still using her. She touched so many peoples lives and she brought an entire town together for prayer. She has brought people to God. She will continue to help people because her family is also donating her organs, so she is going to be saving 200 recipients that are also in their hospital beds praying for a miracle. God has used her to be their miracle. 

Miracles for Maddy.

Maddy is the Miracle!

Revelation 21:4

4 And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.”

If you would like to donate to the family of Maddy please go to this link: https://www.gofundme.com/2i22kdo

I made this post in a rainbow of colors because Maddy loved all the colors of the rainbow.

The Truth Behind Divorce

The big "D" word, 

and it is just that. 

It is the biggest decision in your life. The one that will alter all of your past and your future. It will change everything from the way you live, your children, and the way people around treat you.

My ex husband and I got together when I was 17 years old. I never really had a chance to be me or figure out what I really wanted. I just knew I always wanted to be married and have children so I just jumped in. We had two beautiful children. I had been having thoughts of leaving for many years that I had suppressed. I had even brought it up to him many times but he never took it seriously. 

Around the 12 year mark I was fully involved in our church. I was the leader of an Awana group, I was a leader in the youth group and I was going to weekly bible studies. Working in the youth group was the best time in my life. Learning (I say that because they are the ones that taught me so much) with such wonderful young people was so very amazing. We went to summer camps and even a mission trip to Costa Rica. Some amazing things happened in that time in my life. Except my life at home. I felt like I was doing these things to please God for sure but also so I didn't have to be home in the evenings. I tried to skip past talks of marriage with my students because I didn't want to lie to anyone and I didn't know what to say.

I spent time paying attention to other marriages that had gone through a divorce and they seemed happy. I wanted to be happy in that area too. I just didn't know the sacrifice I would have to make with the happiness I already had in all the other areas in my life. 

One day I had had enough and I left. I moved in with my mom. Things just went from bad to worse through the divorce process. It wasn't easy at all. It was quite ugly.

The kids are always the ones that suffer the most.
It has been a hard thing for them to split their time between two parents, two houses, two bedrooms and two neighborhoods. It's hard for school as well. They want to take toys they are interested in back and forth so they take them to school with them every week (this must be embarrassing for them). They do the same with clothes if they have something specific that they want to wear. School papers and announcements don't always get to each parent (even though the school tries really hard). It's hard to plan extra curricular activities and vacations. Everything is mapped out on my calendar for scheduling. These things are not easy tasks. The kids have stayed positive through all of it. They are such loving children and we talk a lot. We always keep communication going and I'm always asking how they are feeling and holding up. They seem to be doing well but this will always make their life a little more difficult.

Family is the next thing to be affected.
The whole family is broken. From family that might have taken you in and stood by you in hard times. To cousins that are no longer cousins. Family trips that are no longer yours. You don't realize these things in the process. You don't think about the other people you will lose. People you have loved, people you have cried on the shoulder of and people that have been there for you.

Friends? You really find out who those are during something like this. Most people don't know how to handle people going through a divorce (which is understandable) but you really need friends to stand by you instead of being scared and staying away. You need friends to call you up and spend time with you. Most of my friends disappeared. 

That's where the church comes in.
I love my church. I still go to this church but nobody here knew how to handle it either. I left the church for a while and during this time I had maybe two or three people try to talk to me through Facebook. My pastor/friend called multiple times but I wasn't ready to talk to him. Friends I had been going to bible study with, for 3 years, just stopped talking to me besides the normal greeting when we see each other at the store. It felt like I was poisoned and nobody wanted to be around me. Like maybe the divorce might rub off on them. 

How did I handle it?

Not well that's for sure. I started going out drinking all the time. The friends I met at the bar made me feel normal. It wasn't like the people I had called my friends for so long that were scared to be around me. These people accepted me for where I was and just worried about me during the process to make sure the kids and I were doing well. I had started to feel accepted but I was also missing something. I had pulled away from God. From the peace and happiness he had been bestowing on my life. I started to fall into a depression full of guilt. I was in a completely different lifestyle in a matter of weeks and it was really hard to get adjusted to. I had uprooted myself from the comfort of my home and I brought my kids along with me (I tried to make things as normal as possible for the kids when they were with me). I pretended that, that was the life I wanted. I had even convinced myself that I didn't need God anymore. I was falling apart a little at a time and telling myself it was okay and normal to be this way. 

What did I learn?

Well, I met my wonderful husband a little while after, which he has been a huge blessing. He has walked with me through the ups and downs of this process. He has stood by the kids and I's side and supported us when things got difficult. He has been my rock. 

What I have learned in this process is divorce is never the option and it will always make things harder(unless you are being abused than that's a different story). You will think it's the only option but it's not. The precious lives of children are not worth altering.  Your own sanity isn't worth altering. I have had people come to me hoping that I would tell them that it was okay to get a divorce and I tell them the opposite. I hope that I am not one of those people that someone looks at saying that I'm happy so they will be too. That's a lie!
Yes, I am happy.
I love my husband!
We have so much love between us and a wonderful life with three beautiful children, but it is the opposite of easy. Every other week that Monday comes when the kids have to go back to their dad's and it's so hard to let them go. It's hard to say goodbye and not see them for a week. It's hard to know that I won't be there to tuck them into bed at night and kiss them in the morning. It's hard to think about the experiences that I won't be a part of. The things they do that they have to remember to tell me about next week. I miss them tremendously every day they are gone.

It's hard on our little one when she has to say goodbye to them all the time. She cries a lot for her Bubba and her Sis-sis. She has trouble sleeping in her room without her Sis-sis. Sometimes we have vacations or trips to places that they aren't able to go on (we can't always control what week activities fall on). Sometimes there are field trips that I can't attend. I miss things, a lot of things. I'm not there for experiences in their lives. I'm not there as a full time mother any longer. There have been so many difficult parts of this that nobody actually fully understands unless they have walked it. But I tell you today not to walk that way. Don't take that direction. It's not worth it. There is always a way to fix a marriage and you will always come to a time of difficulty if you let it.

There is a reason that God has the perfect plan for marriage. When we don't go by his plan then we are the ones that get hurt and we hurt a lot of other people in process. Just look at our hurting world around us. Look at all the hurting people. If we would just live the lives that God designed for us so many things would be different.

Work on your marriages.
Build your Love for one another.
Spend time together.
Do whatever is possible and lean on God to help walk you through! 

1 Corinthians 13:4-8 Love suffers long, and is kind; love does not envy; love does not promote itself, is not puffed up, does not behave badly, seeks not her own, is not easily provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails.

We Are So Broke, When Will It Get Better? Then the blessings come....

Paycheck to paycheck!

That is our life!

We were always broke growing up.

My mom was a single mother, of three children, that worked full time just to make ends meet. People in our church would give us hand me downs for clothes and the church sometimes had to give us money for food or gas to get us to her next paycheck. There were those Christmas's that we would volunteer our time with our church feeding the homeless, then delivering presents around town to kids that didn't have any. After that we would come home to have had someone deliver presents and food to our house as well. I remember times when we wouldn't have any money and have already searched the house for anything. Then all of a sudden in her purse (a place we already looked) there would be a twenty dollar bill. Or the time that we went to the mail box to find an envelope with money from an anonymous person right when we needed it. God always came through when I was a child. We always made it through somehow!

How are we going to make it until next week?

Here we are present day trying to make ends meet.

My husband works two jobs just to provide for our family. It's hard work, he is tired a lot of the time and we are still barely making it through. Paycheck to paycheck we live. A lot of times we can't do things that others are doing because we are out of money.  I have experience with this because of my childhood but it's tiring. We just want to have a little cushion and I have been stressing about it a lot lately. I haven't turned to God about it. I have just been stressing and worrying about it. I have been feeling hopeless. It's been wearing me down. Then my pastor asked me if I was spending time in the bible and in prayer?

No.

I wasn't.

I have been spending all my time worrying, feeling sorry for myself and trying to do everything on my own. My husband goes to work at 4:30am and I am always up with him when he goes. Before I would spend that time reading, working out, or some chore that I needed to do. I decided to take that time to spend with God.

It has only been about two weeks since I started doing this and I am already feeling better. More relaxed and less stressed. I'm starting not to complain as much and I feel hopeful.

About 4 days ago our neighbor brought over a huge bag of clothes for our youngest daughter. It was so nice there were a bunch of clothes to finish off Summer and a ton for Winter coming up.

The next day I received a Facebook message from a friend that has a big bag of girl clothes as well for us.

Yesterday, a friend brought by eight bags of boys clothes for my son. Clothes for this year and some for him to grow into.  All of those friends also said they would pass down future clothes as well. Now, none of these people know of our struggles with money because we don't really talk about it with our friends or on Facebook. 

Absolutely Amazing!

I was thinking about it and was amazed by the amazing love of Christ.

He really came through.

We received a bunch of really nice clothes for all our children and we don't have to worry about buying any.

How wonderful is that?

My heart is soaring with joy.

How God loves us and will give to us when we ask.

I have been going through some really hard months. We have had so many struggles and hurts in our short marriage and it's been really hard to start trusting God again. I used to see things like this of God's love for me all the time but this is the first time in over three years that I have seen Him work in my life. Even if it's in something as small as hand me downs.

He has proved to me that He will always provide and the life He has planned for us is much better than the life we think we want. We just have to put our trust in Him.

Try it out!

If you feel discouraged, then I encourage you to spend time with God. Just test it and see what happens. If you want to see miracles in your life then spend time with God!

Philippians 4:19 And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus.

Matthew 6:31-32 Therefore do not be anxious, saying, "What shall we eat?" or "What shall we drink?" or "What shall we wear?" For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all.

 

The Embarrassing Child Screaming in Costco Dilemma

I would never be that parent!

At least that's what I thought.

This was my second child and my oldest girl (who was 5 by this point) would never have thought of throwing a screaming tantrum in a store. I thought I had it covered. I knew how to deal with these kind of situations. I dealt with them before they happened. I never gave in so they would understand that they don't get what they want all the time. I just wasn't that screaming child parent. 

Until my son came along...... He was three years old at this point in his little life. 

We were casually shopping in Costco (which is always their favorite place because of the snacks). We were walking the aisles like we would normally do. We love to spend extra time in Costco looking at all the fun things they have. My daughter is walking along the cart and my son is in the basket. My son asked for a toy and like I normally would I told him that he can look at it and hold it but he has to put it back because we weren't going to be buying it. He looked at it for a minute or so, then I went to put it back on the shelf. He started to get upset. I reminded him that we aren't buying it and I told him that when I let him hold the toy.

 It continued to escalate from there.

He started crying louder and louder. I tried the talking approach, didn't work. I tried the ignoring approach but that did nothing. I tried the loving approach, didn't help at all. I even tried to bribe him at this point, no change (normally one of the first three would have helped).

So I told him that we were going to have to leave the store if he didn't stop crying. It got worse so I left my ex husband with my daughter and I started carrying my son through Costco out to the car. 

It was so embarrassing to be that mother walking through a store with a screaming child. Everyone was looking at us, of course. 

Then, to extend the level of embarrassment that I am already enduring he starts slapping my face. Luckily, we were exiting the door. I held his hands down so he couldn't slap me anymore. It was so humiliating. When we got to the car, I strapped him into his car seat so I could take a breather before talking to him. He immediately calmed down as I climbed into the front seat. I turned on the car and the A/C to cool down. Then he started the sad cry and just kept saying, "I'm sorry mommy," over and over. It made my heart melt. So when we were both fully calmed down I turned towards the back seat to talk to him. We talked about what he did wrong and how he can handle calming down the next time this happens (better not be a next time). He apologized and I took him out of his car seat so we could hug and give kisses. 

So far, this has been the first and last time I have had a screaming child in a store. Not that I judged mom's that have gone through this before, usually I just feel for them. But after this I had a whole new understanding of what those mother's have gone through. 

So I commend all those mother's of a screaming child!

Strength be with you :)

Proverbs 29:17
Discipline your son, and he will give you rest; he will give delight to your heart.

Loving others when you really don't want to.

You know that one person (or many people) in your life or that you have crossed paths with that just get to you? 
The ones that you just want to get away from as soon as possible? The ones that make you feel terrible just by being in the same room? 

Those are the people that need the most love. 

It's hard to love others sometimes.

At other times people make it really easy. But most of the time people are difficult.

Most people have heard the saying up above. It's true, not just for women but for all of us. 

Have you ever wondered what that crabby person working at McDonalds has gone through that day or that month? Or the rude homeless man? Or maybe even your boss? Maybe someone you see at the coffee shop everyday? 

People are difficult and hard to love. It's hard to smile and be nice to that neighbor that is just rude and disrespectful. That person that gives you that horrible look each day when you see them while getting lunch. Those people that look down on you as if they are better. It's hard to Love when people make you feel awful.

Ephesians 4:2 Be completely humble and gentle, be patient, bearing with one another in love.

There are so many books, websites and posts about loving others and how you can reach beyond yourself. You can google and get everyone's opinions of how to do this. Walk into a book store and see shelves of books on loving others. Yet we still don't know how to do it.

What about family? Friends? Coworkers? Do we really take the time anymore to find out what the difficulties are in the lives of the people close to us? I have had multiple young men take their lives around me lately and I just wonder how many of us look back and wonder if we could've taken more time to find out about them and what they were going through. We as a human race know how to hide how we feel really well. We all have things hidden that we don't want to talk to others about. Things we are ashamed of. Things we are hurt by. But would that change if someone really asked us? I don't mean the usual, "how are you?" that we always say and expect someone to just say, "oh, good" and walk on by. I'm talking about actually taking the time to care about others around us. Taking the time to stop and really ask. Or talk to that person in the coffee shop. Or that difficult neighbor. 

All it takes is Love!

Slow down and think about others around you instead of what you need to do next and where you need to be. We live in such a selfish world and we are always thinking about what we need to buy and what we want to plan for our future that we are running around from place to place never stopping to think of others. I'm not saying that I'm good at this because I'm not. I have the hardest time when I'm around others not worrying about my own insecurities. Or too busy just watching and dealing with my kids to pay attention to others around me. Sometimes I even have so many worries of my own that I forget to even ask or listen to my own husband. 

Enemies! 

Loving your enemies is the hardest of all. Loving the ones that have hurt you. How about Loving the ones that have hurt a family member or friend? I didn't fully understand this for the longest time. I didn't really have any enemies my struggles were always just difficult people but now I have someone that has hurt me deeply. This person also hurt my family deeply and did it for their own satisfaction with no thought or care to the people they hurt. So this is such a struggle for me. I have to remind myself of this all the time and I don't know how I will really respond when this person and I come in contact (which will happen eventually because we live in a small town). 

God calls us to Love our enemies because he knows it will be better for US in the long run. It will help us to forgive them and become more like Jesus.  

Luke 6:35 But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked

Loving others will help us find peace and joy in the midst of struggles and sin.

1 Peter 4:8 Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.

So the next time you see that person, or even if you think about them. Remember to show Love at all times. Take time out of your busy schedule to really listen to someone else.

Then you will realize that your not the only one struggling! 

Why I want another baby!

Another BABY?

Why in the world would I want another baby?

As a kid I always knew I wanted a lot of children. I just love little ones. From middle of the night wakings to learning to throw a ball and even to the tantrums that you try not to laugh at.

Of course life brings changes. Some things just happen and some are by choices we make. Only God knows the real out come of our lives. 

I want my children to grow up in a family with a lot of brothers and sisters. I tell my kids all the time to be kind to one another because they will always be in each other's lives and they will always be family. I love to hear them playing together and enjoying each other. 

When we are old!

Think about it? Later in life our home will be filled with so much love. It will be full of our children and grand children running around playing and getting into mischief. I just think about it and look forward to those days in the future and it makes me smile. 

Entertainment Centers!

They are the best entertainment centers. My kids love to entertain each other. They play together with all of their free time. They hardly ever fight (it does happen, just not that often). I just look in their rooms while I'm making dinner and watch them playing Lego's together or reading on their bean bags. It just makes my heart soar.

The rough world!

This world is getting worse everyday. I worry about the world they are being brought up into. There are so many things that I don't want my kids to be exposed to that they are now learning in school at a very young age. I try my best to protect my kids from all the harmful things in this world, while teaching them the real issues going on today. I wish we lived in a better, safer, and morally sound world but we don't. So It's up to us parents to raise children with these values and the love of God so they can take it out into the world and change it.

Plus it's biblical....lol

Psalm 127:3-5
Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one's youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate.

So to sum it up, yes I would like to have more children. The amount? As many as my husband will allow me to have. Do I care if people look at me strange when I have three children already? No! Everyone has their own opinion on this matter. So for those of you not wanting children, or wanting only one or two. I say that is wonderful. Enjoy your life, no matter how large your family!